If my fingers are freezing while riding down to school when it’s 52 degrees, what is going to happen when it actually gets to be cold? It’s going to be a disaster. Is every Fall this bad, or has the sudden jump from high 70s-low 80s to low 50s just shocked my system? At least I know that the next time the temperature rises above 50 (next March or April) it’ll feel like summer and I’ll have the urge to wear shorts. It’s crazy how the human body can adapt.

Speaking of body adaptations, there’s a few I could use and a few I’ve seen advertised I could do without. If my body could adapt to not be hungry all the time, that would be great. And while my freakish popping ankles are a cool party trick, I’m pretty sure it’s a sign of bad things ahead in the ability-to-move department. I covet the ability to do an unassisted pull-up. Also, I think the ability to teleport would be super useful. “You’re making spaghetti and strawberry fluff, Mom? I’ll be there for dinner.” (On a completely unrelated note, I made spaghetti – as in made sauce myself instead of trusting good ol’ Trader Joe to do it for me – last weekend and I wondered why I even bother buying it. It’s so much better home-made!)

There ARE some adaptations we, in our advanced state of medical knowledge, can apparently handle. I’ve been watching some episodes of various shows on Hulu, and have been highly irritated by the ads. This is why I can’t watch TV.

Who cares enough about the state of their eyelashes to go to their doctor and ask for a prescription? I have only once in my life gone to the doctor of my own volition, and that was because I was in intense pain from an ear pimple. Nasty, huh? After I got there and found out it was just a pimple and not a killer ear infection, I decided I should have stuck it out for one more day and I would have been fine. Pimples go away, you know. I cannot imagine going because my eyelashes are nonexistent. There is no unbearable pain from sparse lashes. Also, the side effects of the drug sound way worse than the horrible, shocking, and inexcusable concept of going through life without thick, luscious eyelashes.

Second, the wrinkle stuff (apparently different from Botox, but same general idea). It’s mostly the ad that bothers me. “Everyone will notice! But no-one will know!” What the HECK does that even mean? First, if somebody notices something, they know it exists. Second, if somebody notices that on Tuesday you have those dreaded mouth “parentheses” and on Wednesday they’re gone, they’re certainly going to know that “somethin’ happened!” It makes no sense.

I’ll stick with my wrinkles and pale, albino-esque eyelashes, thank you very much. (Although on Wednesday somebody asked me if I was a freshman. Sorry, no. That was six years ago. Holy smokes I’m old!)


2 Responses to “Adaptation”

  1. 1 Lauren October 3, 2009 at 4:38 pm

    I’ve been thinking the EXACT SAME THING!

    Cold = terrible right now
    commercials on hulu = weird.

  2. 2 Kimwithak October 5, 2009 at 10:14 am

    I think the switch from warm to cold is a jolting one. You get used to the cold over time, but when it first comes that’s miserable.

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October 2009
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